What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
