btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
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