Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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