when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize