dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
