I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
