so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
