Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize