What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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