it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize