He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize