That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
