hotel room ftw
You're my little dorito
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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