yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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