My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
