it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
