I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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