I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize