im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
