After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
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Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
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I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
so he's a sleeptalker.
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.