white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
