Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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