Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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