I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
