My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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