Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
