The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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