I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
