Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
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Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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