I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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