We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
