how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize