she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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