But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
last night I used snow as a chaser
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
