Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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