She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
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I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
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It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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