is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
this hospital has no fireball
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
