Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
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