The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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