Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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