So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
