Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
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i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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