i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
His hands were made for my vagina.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize