You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
