if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize