He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
