went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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