I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize