you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
He better not be in your backpack
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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