u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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